Shadows of Love
by DevilFawks
Summary: Taking place shortly after L's death, this fic tells the story of the only woman he ever loved. The one he left behind. *suggestive in later chapt* *summary may change*
1. Gifts You Left Behind

"…What…?"

"…I'm sorry…But L is dead…Wammy too"

The girl felt her legs wobble and give out, Mellow caught her as she fell. Fresh tears poured down her cheeks.

"…How…?"

"He was murdered…by Kira…"

"…Kira…." She growled, she then groaned clutching her stomach.

"Are you alright?" Mellow began, distressed.

"…Yes…Please…I just…need to sit down…" She panted.

"I'll get you some water" Mellow said, helping her into a chair.

Near sat on the floor, putting together a puzzle, "I'm surprised you came all the way out here already knowing that the news was grave. All this stress can't be good for the baby…"

The room went silent.

"Attentive as always, Near" She sighed.

"…You're…pregnant…?" Mellow began.

"…Yeah…and I wanted to keep it a secret but of course my bratty little brother had to let the cat out of the bag"

"…is it…his…?"

"…Yes…it is…"

_Flashback..._

The little girl sat sobbing on the floor of the hallway. Her long ash blonde hair in tangles about her face.

"Quiet down, you're making a racket"

She looked up at the boy now standing over her, he had black hair and big dark eyes. He looked as if he hadn't slept in months and had a book tucked under his arm. He wore a shirt that was much too big for him and jeans coming down over his bare feet.

"How do you expect people to get anything done with you carrying on like that? What's wrong with you?"

"…My mama died and…some strange man brought me here…they took away my baby brother and…I see…scary things all the time…" she sniffled.

"You have problems…" he whistled. She began to cry again.

"No more of that now…why don't you make yourself useful and go read or something?"

"…I…can't read…" she sniffled again. The boy gave a sigh, "What's your name?"

"…Marisol…"

"Alright, Marisol, if I teach you to read will you stop crying?"

She looked up at him, "…You…would do that?"

"Only if you promise to stop making so much noise"

"…Okay…" Marisol said, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. The strange boy offered her a hand and she took it.

"…You haven't told me your name…"

"My name…Hmmm…call me L"

* * *

"My brother!" Marisol cried peeking into the crib.

"See, he's not gone, they just moved him to the nursery…"

"I'm glad he's okay" she smiled.

"What happened to your family?" L asked. Her smile faded.

"…It was just me and my mama and little brother, my papa died a long time ago…He left us a mansion and a lot of money. My mama could see things and would entertain people with the things she saw. I see things, too, but most of the time they're scary…sometimes angry…Mama said they would never hurt me…my brother won't be able to see them because he's a boy and only girls get to see them" she said, brushing back his pale hair.

"…Some people didn't like what mama said she saw…Mama saw them coming…she hid me and my brother in the garage when they came…the police said they violated her then shot her and set the house on fire to cover it up…I heard my mama screaming but I was too afraid to do anything."

L stared at her intently.

"…I saw my mama for a little while after that. She said…it wasn't my fault and she was glad me and my little brother were okay…She kept all the bad things away from me…but…when we came here…she said she couldn't come with us and to take care of my little brother…There are a lot more scary things here and they always pick on me at night…"

"There is no such thing as ghosts…" L said simply.

"What?!"

"Their existence cannot be proven, therefore they don't exist"

"…Well…it hasn't been disproven!" Marisol snapped.

"…True…you pose a very good argument…"

She beamed in triumph.

_...End Flashback_

Marisol shut the door to the apartment, she sighed taking off her coat and flicking on the light.

"So you really were dead" She said turning to the chair. A ghostly apparition of L sat huddled in the armchair.

"_You knew?"_

"I suspected it" she shrugged. "…You came home before the Kira investigation was over…you're not one to do that…"

"_You know me too well"_

Marisol looked away, tears running down her face. A cold hand wiped them away.

"…_You know I can't stand your tears…"_

"…How long will you be here?" she asked as he went over to the window.

"_Until the investigation is finished…"_

"…do you know who Kira is?"

"_Yes…but the trouble will be unmasking him…"_


	2. Loving Your Shadow

_Flashback..._

Marisol closed her eyes, finishing her piece on the piano, there was a standing ovation. She bowed deeply, going back stage.

"Nice work…the dress was a very nice touch"

She turned smiling at who she saw.

"L…" She sighed running to hug him. "I can't believe you came…and wore shoes"

"You asked me to and I thought shoes would be appropriate for such an occasion…besides I solved the case already…" he shrugged.

"Already?! You were just assigned to it a few days ago!"

"…It wasn't that difficult really"

"Whatever freak brain" Marisol rolled her eyes, starting towards the dressing room.

"Speaking of freaks, have you seen anything?"

She glared at him, "…Yes…as a matter of fact I have…I hate old theatres like this…there's always something here…"

"You should be used to it by now, you have a different concert every week for a different skill" L continued, following her.

"Well excuse me for being talented!" she cried slamming the door to her dressing room.

"A prodigy is more like it. You play the piano, flute, violin, Shamisen and you sing in multiple languages…" He said leaning against the door.

"Isn't that the only type of kids that live in 'Wammy's House'?"

"True…You're brother is doing well by the way…"

"Is the brainwashing complete?" she asked skeptically.

"He has a knack for criminology…"

"Only because he and Mellow act like you're god…He even made up a stupid alias for himself, 'Near'? How dumb is that?"

"I like it…"

"You would wouldn't you?" She sighed stepping out of the dressing room. Her eyes alighted on the rafters, she covered them diving into L's chest.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"…Up there…it's a stage hand who hung himself…" she whimpered. "Please let's just get out of here"

He sighed leading her to out a side door.

"There is that better?"

Marisol glanced around, "much…There are less spirits out here…"

"This is strangely reminiscent of when we were children and you would dive into my bed at night…"

"Yeah well…"Marisol prickled as the two got into the limo waiting out back.

"…I wonder how you'd fair with the things you see if I wasn't around…"

"I'm not a child anymore, L" she rolled her eyes. L laid his head in her lap, she sighed.

"You're such a big baby"

"I can't help it if I missed you" he shut his eyes as she began to run her fingers through his hair.

_...End Flashback_

"…_I can hear them…"_

Marisol gazed down at the spectral L, his ear pressed to her already growing stomach.

"There's more than one?"

"_Oh yes…Twins…a boy and a girl"_

Marisol smiled at him, then sighed.

"…_What is it?"_

"…It's nothing…I guess…I'm going to miss you when you're gone…that's all…"

L sat up gazing into her eyes, he leaned into her lips but his kiss was cold as death.

_Flashback..._

Marisol sat by the window, gazing angrily out at the children at play.

"Someone's in a bad mood"

She looked up as L entered the room.

"Go away…"

"Come now, what's wrong?" he asked coming to sit by her on the bed. Marisol's lower lip wobbled and her eyes tiered up.

"…Why do you have to go to Japan!? Furthermore, why didn't you tell me?!"

"Well…I'm going to Japan because it seems their police force is having a hard time catching Kira…and I didn't tell you because I knew you would cry like this" L sighed.

"Whatever…just…get lost already, jerk!" she sniffled, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. L wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"…Come with me"

She looked up into his obscenely wide dark eyes.

"I asked Wammy and he said it was fine…"

"L…" she began.

"…are you two going to kiss now?" Near asked from the door.

"NATE!!" Marisol squealed, blushing. He crossed the room to his bed, reaching under it he pulled out a puzzle. Dumping out the contents, he sat on the floor, beginning to put it together.

"What'll it be? Are you going to Japan?"

"…I don't know…"

"You speak fluent Japanese…" L began.

"You'll get to spend time with L" Near continued.

"But what about you, Nate? You're my kid brother and, although you're a freak sometimes…most of the times…I love you"

"And you're my big sister and I want you to be happy" Near recited without looking at her.

"…Nate…"

"And besides, I don't want to be left here with your whining when L's gone"

"NATE!" Marisol growled, temper flaring. L pulled her against his chest.

"Now, now, it will be fine. There's nothing for you to worry about"

Marisol sighed, her cheeks a light pink.

_...End Flashback_

"Oh, my dear! How many months are you along?" the Realtor asked.

"Seven months" she smiled, placing a hand to her stomach.

"Do you know what it is?"

"Twins actually… a boy and girl"

"So you'll be wanting a three bedroom…" she said typing something into the computer.

"…Preferably…"

"Hmmm…you said before you were living in Japan up til now…What made you want to come back to the States?" she asked absently. Marisol glared down at her feet biting her lip, she played with the locket around her neck.

"…My…husband…he was murdered by Kira…"

"Oh my, I'm sorry! By Kira, you say? Was he a criminal?"

Marisol's expression hardened. "…No… he was…in the way…"


	3. How Can This Be Hell?

_Flashback..._

Marisol didn't look up from her book when the front door opened and closed. She sighed gazing down at the head that was now in her lap.

"I'm back…" L said looking up at her.

"Welcome home…" she sighed. "How's the investigation going?"

"Fine…I think I know who Kira is…though it's going to be difficult to prove it…" L sighed pressing his thumb to his lips in thought.

"I wish you wouldn't do that, it makes you look even more infantile then normal. It's enough that you wear clothes that make you look like a four year old" she sighed running her fingers through his hair.

"I thought that was one of the things you loved about me…"

Marisol flushed pulling her hand away. "…Wh…Who said anything about…love anyway?! To me you're just a nuisance!"

"Don't be so cold!" he whimpered, sitting up.

"Whatever! What to eat?" She blushed heading into the kitchen.

"Hmmm…do we have anymore of that cherry cake?"

"I meant real food. God, I'm surprised you haven't eaten yourself into a diabetic coma by now…"Marisol sighed. L made a rude noise with his tongue.

"Brat!"

L looked at her thoughtfully, he got up, following her into the kitchen.

"Have you finally decided what you want to ea…?"

Marisol was cut off by L's lips closing around hers. She dropped the skillet she was holding. His clever tongue snaked into her mouth. Her knees felt weak and if it wasn't for the stove she would have collapsed. L pulled back, gazing into her half-lidded eyes.

"…It's just as I thought…"

"…Wh…What…?" She sighed.

"You do taste sweeter…"

With that he went into his room and shut the door.

_...End Flashback_

Marisol hummed as she rocked the twins in the cradle.

"…_They're beautiful…"_ she heard L over her shoulder. She smiled softly.

"They're ours…"

"_Will they be able to see me?"_

"The girl will, most definitely…the boy will see you for a time…but…as he grows older…"

"…_It's somewhat painful…to see your children but not be able to raise them…and you…you will grow older while I stay frozen in time"_

"…L…" Marisol began, but he had vanished. She sighed closing her eyes.

_Flashback..._

"Moshi moshi?"

_"Marisol-san, this is your downstairs neighbor..."_

"...Oh, hello"

_"...I just thought you should know, your boyfriend was standing outside in the rain when I got home from work..."_

"He's not my boyfriend...thanks for telling me, he's such a freak, he did that all the time back home..." Marisol sighed.

_"...Is he gonna be okay?"_

"He's fine...stupid...but fine...I'll be right down to get him, thanks!"

Hanging up the phone, she sighed again, pulling on a rain coat and boots. Sure enough, L was standing outside the building in the rain. His eyes were vacant, the look he always had when he was deep in thought.

"Goddamit, Ryuzaki!" Marisol cried. He looked up at her with the expression of a deer caught in headlights.

"I'm not coming out there to get you this time! Get your ass in here before you catch another cold, you idiot!"

He paused for a moment before coming over to her.

* * *

"Honestly, what's your problem, anyway?" She sighed, rubbing a towel through his hair. "You what happened the last time you did something like this. You almost died from the fever!"

"...Maybe...I did die..." L said softly.

"Nani?!"

"...Shinigami...they're real..."

"...L...you're scaring me..." Marisol began.

"...For such a thing to exist...maybe I am dead. This world...filled with so much crime...so much pain...where a petty criminal can be hailed as a god...perhaps...this is hell" He smirked sardonically.

"Don't say that!" Marisol cried. L looked up at her as if he had just realized she was still in the room.

"You talking crazy talk! Of course you alive! I've been around spirits long enough to tell the difference!...Besides..." she continued in a a softer tone. "...We're together...so how can this be hell?"

She blushed under L's insomniac gaze.

"...You're right..." he sighed, lowering his head.

"...are...you okay now?" She asked taking his face in her hands so she could inspect him. L gazed into her eyes, leaning forward, he kissed her softly.

"L!" she cried pulling away. "Jeez! I try to be nice and you pick on me!"

"...Marisol..." he took her hand placing in back on his cold cheek. "...Please stay with me a little longer..."

"...You're...so cold..." she flushed. L's obsidian eyes glinted as he looked up at her.

"Then warm me up..."

Their lips met again and this time, Marisol didn't pull away.


	4. Out Of Touch

"Miss Cruz!"

Marisol looked up as her new neighbor came running toward her. His red hair shone gold in the winter sunlight, his blue eyes were filled with concern.

"Please let me help you with that!" he cried taking the groceries from her arms.

"It's okay, Jeff, I can manage..." She began.

"And exactly how did you intend to open doors, with your legs?" He cried. It was then that the door creaked open by itself, Jeff froze in place.

"...Uh...that's how...tada!" Marisol sweatdropped.

"...Cool trick..."

_"What is he doing here?"_ L's voice murmured in her ear, she ignored it.

"Where are the kids today?" he asked setting the brown paper bags down on the counter.

"My kid brother lives not that far from here, so they went for a visit" she replied.

"Is he famous too?" Jeff smiled jokingly.

"...You...could say that..." Marisol sighed, it was then that she glimpsed L standing directly behind him.

_"...Hmmm, what should I do to him today, I wonder?"_

Marisol shot him a glare.

"...Is something wrong?" Jeff began.

"...Nope! Every thing's fine!" She smiled beginning to put the groceries in the fridge.

"...Marisol...I wanted to ask you...if...you weren't doing anything...then...maybe" Jeff blushed. It was then that the door to one of the children's room slammed shut upstairs.

"...What was that?!"

"...I told you...I'm not ready to date yet..." she sighed.

"...who said anything about a date..." he began, trying to cover his mistake. L's gazed shifted to the dining room, where the chairs and table began to shake. Jeff's glanced off in that direction. Marisol sighed, "...Cut it out, L..."

"Did you say something?" Jeff asked.

"...Hmmm? Nope nothing!" she smiled. L smirked shutting his eyes and the rattling stopped.

"...How...did your husband die, anyway?"

Marisol glanced at L who said nothing.

"...He was murdered...by Kira..."

"...I'm sorry to hear that...was he a criminal?"

"...No...he was assigned to the Kira case..."

"...Why do they have to hunt Kira?" Jeff began. Marisol looked up, L opened his eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"...He's not doing anything wrong! If anything he's helping the public"

_'Uh-Oh...' _Marisol sweatdropped. She glanced at L, he was standing behind Jeff, his wide insomniac gaze, focused into a death glare.

"I do feel bad for those guys in the police force that got killed, but it seems to me that if they just left Kira alone..."

L's eyes glowed, Jeff was then yanked to the kitchen doorway where he managed to brace himself against the door jamb.

"...What...the hell...?!" he huffed.

"...Looks like you pissed him off..." Marisol sighed.

"...Wha...?! Pissed who off?"

"...It doesn't really matter, now...Bye Jeff!" she said quickly as he was yanked through the doorway, down the hall and out the front door.

"...Too bad...I liked him" She sighed.

_"...It is too bad, because I'm never letting him back in this house again..."_

Marisol chuckled.

_Flashback..._

Marisol opened her eyes blinking slowly, she sat up in bed.

"...Huh...? How did I get in bed...and...why am I wearing L's shirt...?" she murmured drowsily. Glancing around, she came to a shocking realization. "...Isn't this...L's room...?"

It was then that the door opened and L came in in only his jeans, with a plate of cheesecake.

"You're awake I see...I'm sorry to have left you alone but I wanted the last slice of cake"

"What do you...?" Marisol began, wincing at the red hot shot of pain surging between her legs. L sat down beside her.

"Sorry about that...it was my first time so I didn't really know what I was doing...I'm sorry if I hurt you"

"...You mean we..." She blushed.

"We had sex. You don't remember?"

"Oh...my...god..."

"And here I thought I was unforgettable, you're breaking my heart, Mari-chan"

"...How could we have done that...?!"

"...You seemed to enjoy it, I got several calls from the neighbors due to your screams"

"OH MY GOD!!" She cried burying her face in her hands.

"...It was a joke..."

"...Not...Fuckin'...Funny, L" Marisol growled. L set the plate on the end table, pulling her to him.

"I don't regret what we've done, so you shouldn't either. I love you, no one else..."

"...L..." she blushed. His eyes glinted in the darkness.

"...Call me by my name...I want to here it from you..."

"...Lawliet..." Marisol flushed, his name rolling off her tongue.

He leaned forward kissing her passionately. Marisol moaned softly wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling him back down on the bed. The slice of cake on the end table lay forgotten.

_...End Flashback_

"Thanks for watching the kids, Near. I know it probably took away from the investigation" Marisol began.

"...Not really, we have our leads, I just continued with them there. They're very bright, they seemed to know what's going on..."

"...Yeah, they've known who their father was all their lives and that he had some connection to Kira..."

Near stared at her for a long time, "I don't mind watching them...it's nice to have someone to play with"

"When are you gonna grow up?"

"...When they stop making toys so interesting..." He replied going up the stairs to the children's rooms.

_"...your brother is an exceptional criminologist" _L said from behind her.

"I guess you trained him well..." she smiled. A pair of spectral arms encircled her waist, she shivered at the cold touch. He pulled away.

"L..."

_"...Forgive me...I keep forgetting I can't touch you anymore..."_

With that, he vanished into the wall.


	5. Marriage

_Flashback..._

"...I won't be able to see you again for a while"

Marisol gazed down at the pale boy now wrapped in her arms.

"Why not?"

"The Kira investigation is heating up, Wammy has already built us a head quarters and I'm afraid I must spend all my time there..." L replied, sitting up in bed.

"...Oh..." Marisol sighed.

"...I want to finish this case so we can get married as soon a possible"

She perked up, "...M...married...?"

"Why not? Is spending your life with me so horrible?"

"...It's...not that...it's just...we just got together...and it may be too soon to..."

"...I love you...In my entire career of hunting down criminals, I have never been more sure of anything..."

"L..." she blushed.

"...Besides, you're not on the pill anymore, you could get pregnant..." he sighed reclining against the head board.

"What the hell!" she screeched. He smirked, leaning over her, she shuddered when he ran his hand up her thigh.

"Since we won't be together for a while...let's make some sweet memories..."

_...End Flashback_

L stared out the window at the calm landscape.

"L? Is something the matter?" Marisol asked coming up behind him.

_"...They're close...they are all so close to catching Kira..."_

Marisol said nothing, glancing away.

_"...I'll have to go soon, won't I?"_

"...Kira being caught is your unfinished business..."

She felt his cold hand on her cheek.

_"...I love you...I love our children..."_

"I know you do..." she smiled. But as the sun began to set, L began to fade.

"L!"

_"...Goodbye..."_

Marisol stood, staring at the spot he had been standing not moments ago. Tears ran races down her cheeks, she fell to her knees, sobbing softly.

_Flashback..._

Marisol watched half-heartedly as L slipped on his sandals.

"If you keep pouting like that your face will stay that way" he said.

"...Whatever..." she huffed. L gently caressed her cheek.

"...I'll be sure to wrap this up quickly, so start picking out a wedding dress"

"Okay" she smiled placing her hand on his. He kissed her passionately, Marisol sighed, leaning into the kiss. L's phone vibed in his pocket.

"...Looks like Wammy is downstairs..."

"Be careful" she said firmly.

"If I must" he said with a smile. Marisol smiled as she watched him walk out the door. Blissfully oblivious to the fact that this was the last time she would see her lover alive.


	6. Free

Just to let the readers know, the reason why I chose this name for my OC is because my friend luvs L and I know of no one better to bare L's child3

* * *

"I don't even know why we had to come all the way out here" Matsuda complained.

"It was L's last wish, stop complaining" Aizawa replied.

"To hunt down this 'Cruz' guy after Kira was caught and let him know? Plus this guy moved to America after L died! This sounds sketchy if you ask me..." Matsuda went on.

"Shut up already, we're here!" Aizawa cried as they pulled up to a large old looking house.

"...Looks like this guy has kids..." Mogi noted the toys out front. Aizawa knocked on the door.

"Coming!" a female voice called. All three were shocked to see the beautiful woman answer the door, her long hair was tied back, her eyes glinted in the sunlight.

"...Can I help you?" she asked in perfect Japanese.

"...Um...my name is...Shuichi Aizawa...this is Kanzo Mogi and Tota Matsuda. We were formerly members of the Kira defense force. Does a 'Cruz' live here by any chance?"

"...Oh yes, I'm Marisol Cruz, please come in!" she smiled leading them into the living room.

"Please forgive my appearance! My kids'll be home from school any minute so I was just getting some snacks ready..."

"...What's there to forgive..." Matsuda began but Mogi nudged him hard in the stomach.

"Would you like some tea? I just fixed a pot"

"Yes thank you"

"Judging by your appearance here, my guess is that you caught Kira..." Marisol said filling their cups.

"...Yes...unfortunately he's dead..."

"_Un_fortunately?" She raised an eyebrow taking her own seat. The others looked at her with a somewhat shocked expression. She held the cup to her lips, shutting her eyes.

"Light Yagami was Kira, am I right?"

"How did you...?!" Matsuda began.

"L told me...after he was killed by the shinigami..." she said taking a sip.

"...How...?" Mogi's mouth hung open.

"...I am a medium. L's spirit has been hanging around here waiting for Kira to be caught. And when he was, L was able to move on..."

"...Just what is your relationship with L?" Aizawa began. It was then that the door opened and the stomping of little feet was heard coming down the hallway.

"Mommy!" a little girl's voice rang out in song.

"Mama?" a boy's voice whispered softly.

"In here kids!"

Aizawa, Mogi and Matsuda all wore the same expression of shock when the children entered the room. They were both the spitting image of L, same spikey hair, same dark eyes. They seemed more cheerful, their eyes so bright without the dark circles, though the boy seemed to be hunching slightly.

"How was school?" Marisol smiled.

"Brother failed his scoliosis test" the girl said bluntly.

"Lil!" the boy blushed.

"Well you did!"

Marisol chuckled, "Can you two go play for a while, mommy has guests"

"Okay!" They said in unison, dropping their bookbags and dashing up the stairs. The room was silent for a long time.

"...Those kids...they're..." Matsuda began.

"They're L's children, Lilint and Lawliet" she replied taking another sip of tea before setting it down on the coffee table. "L and I grew up together in 'Wammy's House'. When he came to Japan for the Kira investigation he took me with him..." she smiled sadly, "He said he wanted to finish the investigation quickly...so...we could get married..."

Others looked at her in shock.

"So you'll have to forgive me when I say that Kira's death is not so unfortunate..."

"Wait a minute, if you grew up in 'Wammy's House'...that means you know L's real name!" Matsuda said excitedly.

"Matsuda!" Aizwawa began.

"Yes, I do, in fact, Near is my kid brother" she chuckled.

"...Um...what is...L's real name...?" Mogi began. Aizawa shot him a glare.

"It's alright! I'm sure curiousity has gotten the best of you...Well...I gave my son his father's name..."

"'Lawliet'?" Matsuda asked.

"...Yes...though...I could only call him that when we were alone...and I more accustomed to calling him L..." Marisol sighed. "...L didn't know I was pregnant when he was alive...and I loved him so very much...he was always the sweetest when he smiled..."

She blushed when she realized others were still in the room.

"...Oh...please forgive me..."

"...It's nothing to be ashamed of..." Matsuda began. Aizawa cleared his throat.

"...Well...we'll be going now...thank you for your time..."

"Not at all! Thank you for the good news" Marisol smiled showing them to the door. She watched as they got in their car and sped away.

"Mommy!" Lilint's frantic voice squealed. She dashed down the stairs tear streaming down her face.

"What is it my love, calm down..." Marisol cooed, picking her up.

"...I can't find daddy anywhere...he said he'd read to me..." she sniffled rubbing her eyes. Marisol sighed, gazing up at the sky.

_'...L...where ever you are...I hope you are happy and safe..."_

_THE END_


End file.
